continue

well... I've made it from FF to M. got some food in my stomach and I've even printed the posters for JOF. improvements. now I only have to glide down S-road and then I'm there. work. maybe need some chocolate. or a good coffee at wayne's. not sure I have the money to spend on luxury. my cravings might do it though. ;)
oboy, this is not very intellegent posting. but, I don't feel too intellegent at the moment. not too many wise thoughts. not too many, but still some. don't worry.

When it all got started

new week, new day, new focus. well, I'm not sure I've succeded yet though I havn't really started to put check-marks on my to-do-list. otherwise the day probably will be fine. be ok. I just feel a little bit out of balance. like my body decided to stay on yesterday. but isn't that typical for mondays? meet a friend whom I havn't seen for months now in chuch yesterday. it was great to see her again but my english was really bad. even though I've been writing almost everyday in english my speaking seem to be forgotten. not too good. have to meet her for a "fika" and refresh it. because it starting to be embarrassing. well, now it's almost time for some economy-work. our presentation has been moved from this friday till thursday in two weeks, because of my partner's vacation. it's ok but I rather do the presentation as quick as possible to really get on schedule with school. I intend to improve my organisation and hand-in-homework-in-time skills. wish me luck 'cause I've realized it's not gonna be too easy. as I of course first thought. ^^ hope to make progress though. :)

time to go.. hope that I'll get some but-kicking-energy for the afternoon. (work) so I won't be this lazy. ;) over.

sunday, what more to it?

today's been a great day. a day full of joy and just love. service at church was great. it really felt like people was gathering because of a reson. a reson to get closer to each other but more important, closer to God. and I believe the feeling is real. It was good to be filled with God again and just to Worship him together in church. no I feel like I'm ready to face an other week. later we had family dinner with lot of talking, laughing, sharing and just annoying each other in a loving way. what more can I say than family? :)
now I've been out on the roads with mom. we've been driving all the way to my grandma's house and back again and that's quite a way to drive. I'm proud of my self :) well, I think that's all the update. I'm just glad that this week has been alright and that I actually look forward to next week. that's a good sign. a very good sign.

my thoughts goes swedish!

just a little mark: I just discovered that you can use google to translate websites. well, I had to try it! so I translated my blog.. haha.. nothing more to say. ;)

ps. if you want or think it's takes too much time to read in english you can use the tool.. but remember the translation is a little bit weird sometimes..

mornings

now, I'm almost ready to go to work and time's 8.30 am. feels like almost before dawn but I know it's not even early for some people. I decided to have a cup of tea and just write a little bit, just to get some thoughts out of my head. this morning, it was quite easy to get out of bed. it's usually not. but I guess you have your "easy-getting-out-of-bed" moments sometimes. well, as usually when I get up early, I hit by the beauty and the calm atmosphere that you only can find before people has woken up. it's just you and the small birds clearing their voices and it's often a little humidity in the air like the coldness don't really want to leave. and if you meet any person out on the street, propably walking their dog, you greet each other with a little understanding smile. you know that they also appreciate this time of the day as special as it's suppouse to be.

too far away

just a little "hello" to you my dear girl.
a little "hello" from my heart just to say that I'm glad to have you as my friend. I miss you ♥

life.trust.love.How?

..where ever you are. to feel safe no matter what goes around you. to have comfort and trust even if you don't know what to expect. to depend. to let go. to believe that God have control and that you don't have to do anything but rely on him. to love, and to give. take care of and protect. to manage every thing you don't. to comfort and to be the refuge you need. that's His job. all I have to do is to relax, have some faith. to depend. to let go. to believe and to have him as my refuge. but that's hard enough.

above all else

"Jesus, my passion in life is to know you. May all other goals bow down to, this journey of loving you more. Jesus, You've showered your goodness on me. Given your gift so freely. But, there's onething I'm loning for. Hear my hearts cry, and my prayer for this life.

Above all else, Above all else, Above all else. Give me yourself.

Savior, the more that I see Your beauty. The more that I glimpse Your glory.My heart is captured by You. Jesus, You are my greatest treasure. Nothing this world can offer, Could ever compare to You.So, hear my heart’s cry, And my prayer for this life. "
- Vicky Beeching

this will be my quote for this fall. I really want to know God better and discover his plan for my life. for real. I know it will be hard but it's true, the more that I glimpse His glory, I want to be captured and be taken on his adventure, his plan, what he has thought should be the meaning for my life. And I know that in my prayers there's power.

timetraveling

today, I've worked at the dancestudio with all the little kiddos again. very fun but also a little bit exhausting. four hours, four classes and it all starts at 9.00 am. well, not a killer time but still it was a little bit hard to get out of bed this morning knowing that every saturday from now on will be the same. but after all I love them all. plus I might got one more hour at monday's. more work, more money and more fun! hopefully ;)

know after a couple hours of resting I'm preparing for my aunt's birthday party and a hughe one. at six a clock everyone turns into counts and countesses, noblemen and women and poor farmers with their riff-raffs. the time's changing from 2009 into 1507and things and computers goes (today's update for the spelling contest ;) bye bye. it's the middle age and no one goes safe for the terrifying pest.

tired

I really need a rest. my mind's too full and I feel like I've had it for several days now. but I know it's just a feeling.

okay, today it's really time to start livin'. but it's sunny outside though and that makes it a little bit better. well, I don't feel too wise for the moment so I don't really know what to share with you guys today but the weather. soon it's time for lesson and then hopefully some good time shopping with J. :) he's off soon so we'll have to do some shopping before that ;) well, as I said. not too intellegent today. better off tomorrow!

woh...

off to school... weird sentence... ;)

hmm...

it was something I was going to write, something I've thought of for couple of days now and really wanted to post. and now I've lost it. haha. well my brain isn't really going fast enough. well, school's starting tomorrow and hopefully I'll get back my "smartness". and till then you've just got to cope with this non interesting post and live with it and love me for my goofy old self. so my confusion is a regular thing but I've got a calender now to put my weeks and scedual a little bit easier to handle.. hope I don't loose it though. it has happened....

happy birthday!

sometimes the small things are the best. this was more perfect than I thought.

re-energizing

today, work has been a loong day of nothing good. my head aches and I'm frustrated and tired. nothing useful has been done today, sadly. well, a couple of yatzy-games but that didn't do too much though. now I need a big time cosy and take care of evening starting with some ice-cream, tea and a good movie. put on my soft jersypants and just lay down on my bed and get some nice qualitytime by myself. house's quiet and empty and I need that to re-load my batteries. it's as good as it can be after a hardwork day.

spaa..

isn't it just soo refreshing!? xD
loved it just because.

well, sometimes life can need just a touch of a peeling. just a touch of moisturizeing. just a touch of refreshment. we're preparing for a loong winter. next time we need some snacks though. and of course less of the banana hair due!;)though we all loved it in some way...

lovely

this monday was all I wanted it to be. just wanted you to know that.
with love

is there a map somewhere!?

sometimes I wonder how I can live my life. in what directions I can go and what consequenses I would like my life to have. I wonder what achievements I can make and what it will cost to make them. I think about what role I play in other peoples lives and what role I can be making. I think about the possibilites I have and at the same time I wonder what I can or should do. How and what should I do with my life? and is it really my life? but then if it's not my life, but God's how do I do to give Him my life? what do I do to act like he wants and needs me to? and how, how, how do I have to do to figure it out? how I can make his desires for my life come true and more important what does he wants with my life? it's hard because sometimes I just know for certain and sometimes I just can't make the thoughs and questions in my head clear and still. they just spin around like crazy and I don't know how to sort them out. it's a little bit confusing to live with the thought that my life's not my own and that I want somebody else to be in charge of it. I mean it's a lot of trouble when you're suppouse to make decisions in your life and it's not you who have the last saying. and I must admit that it scares me, not just a bit but a lot.and yet it's my highest wish that God will have such place in my heart and life that I just can't make any thing without He being part of it. you get what I mean? I'm not ever sure I do but I guess that's the beauty of the life with God. you never now what direction it will take or how you will do to get there. you've have to be curious and be part of an adventure and be prepared that it's not easy but worth it.

...

where do you get your streangth?

the synonym of

restoration
resuscitation
reinvigoration
revival
resurrection

woha, that's a lot of synonyms. well, do you get what feeling I'm going for? well, today my new contact lenses arrived to my mailbox. and I feel like I was restorated or resuscitated or reinvigorated or what ever you would like it to be. I was now alloud to leave my glasses, my feeling of tiredness and my uncomfortableness on the desk aside of my bed. only if it was that easy. do you sometimes feel like you would like to just take of your insecureness and put it aside when ever you needed it? just like a pair of glasses you didn't like to wear? this morning I was happy to put on my new pair of sunglasses and just hide behind that cool-factor and feel like a celebrity on my way to work. wind in my hair, my high-waist jeans and just that feeling of self-confidence a good-looking day gives you. I'd put one pair of glasses on my night-stand and one other pair on. and suddenly the whole way I'm looking on myself changed. really, I'm not happy to admit that. and I think of myself as a happy and confident girl "in my best days" and it takes a simple pair of glasses to change the way I'm feeling about myself. and to be recognized my glasses is actually quite fashionable. well it's weird. but this past days while I was waiting for my contacts to arrive I hade several minutes to work on myself and my cool-factor. and I know I needed it. call it revival, resurrection or what ever you would like. but everyday I know I have to work a little bit more just to love myself as the way I should. just to feel comfortable the way I am a little bit more. and I know I own God that because he has created me too beautiful to not do so. I'm beautiful the way I am and that's because God intended me to be just that way.

well, ain't I a real cruiser?

I've just realized that I actually can be in a car and make it go forward, backwards and sidewards. and I can actually, manage the car to go those directions without hiting anything or crash into something. and actually today I driven through the whole town!! I'm real proud. just wanted you all to know that this is the most and bigges acomplishment I've made for the moment! :)

well, this day I've been off from work and spendt some time with Kajsa. who are such a sweet person and whom I like very much. thank you for spending time with me :)
also I've experienced that god loves me even if I act in a way he don't like me to do. Samuel Ljungblahd's written a song with lyrics: "How can you keep on loving me when I'm acting like this?" and I believe that's really true. or at least I feel so and it's a question that has been on my mind for several days now. How can he keep on loving me? I'm not acting as I'm suppouse to, I'm not thinking as I'm suppouse to and I'm not loving as I'm suppouse to. and sometimes it feels like I don't deserve any of His love. and that my friends is the beauty of it. really. it might sound crazy but I believe that's what it's all about.unconditional love. and that means that God will keep on loving me no matter how I act. and that's a promise.

aaah

the clever moment have passed. work has become a place where time seems to be almost like it doesn't exists. it just wont travel in any direction. I feel exhausted yet I haven't done anything to exhaust myself. but still my brain feels like it's slept for almost 1098 years. interesting.

now's time to actually be alive and do something active. good. :)
I hope I have better luck this evening.