when life doesn't come your way

my deepest wish, my deepest request. my thoughts that are the same as my heart.
"You are the only one, You are the one that I desire. You are the only one my King"
but why is it so hard to live by. to follow, to do? if it's your highest and deepest desire, how come you can't make it real? come through with it. put it in to work. to actions. to focus. to live by the spirit and his command. his heart.

In my self I'm no one.
On my own I can do nothing.